The Empath Part One
Being an empath during the holidays and winter in general is overwhelming to say the least. When you are sensitive, the world around you can become almost larger than life. Cars going by, strong scents in the air, a rough fabric on your skin, christmas music blaring, dishes clinking at a restaurant. Our senses are heightened to the fullest and daily life can become just too much unless proper care is taken.
I had the idea to write about being an empath because of some things going on in my own life. I’m slowly learning that my daughter(s?) is an empath, too. It is a tough pill for me to swallow for some reason. I’m still navigating what I can do to help her. Since writing helps me process, I am writing this article in two parts. This first part will be some thoughts I have about being an empath during the holidays. The second part will be some tools and tricks on how to cope and even thrive as an empath!
I remember thinking as a kid that I might just be defunct.
Like I was made wrong. Back then, I didn’t know what an empath or a highly sensitive person was. My parents surely didn’t either. So when I’d check out with a migraine or bad behavior or hide in the corner crying, we all just assumed I was just ‘having a hard time’ again.
Knowing what I know now, I know that I’m not defunct but in fact, I have a gift. This gift allows me to see what isn’t there, hear what isn’t be said, feel what another is feeling and know that there really is magic all around us.
This gift that I am blessed with just happens to have requirements of “maintenance”, I like to call it.
Because I know that I am easily overwhelmed by sounds, scents, people, and bright lights, it is on the top of my priority list to do, well….the opposite. Enter: The Holidays. They are extra noisy, extra bright, extra people and extra scents. Combined with the holidays being triggering for a lot of people, its no wonder that it is such a stressful time of year for so many of us.
Winter itself is actually a season of introspection. The darkness calls in a time of going inward and gathering of one’s reserves. So having to do the exact opposite during the holidays can feel very unnatural, often times causing dis-ease and dis-comfort. My entire adult life, I’ve spent the holiday season in a constant state of stress, overwhelm and illness.
This year, I’m doing things differently.
I’m giving myself permission to say ‘no’ to that which drains my energy. By honoring myself, I’m creating space to help my sensitivity thrive so that I can truly connect with what matters to me most.
When we honor ourselves, and allow ourselves space to thrive, it is then that we can sense and enjoy the real magic of the season
I’ve been starting to notice where my energy is going and do my best to follow and respect that. For instance, decorating the tree with my kids sounded lovely this week so we indulged in some good holiday cheer. An invite to a neighborhood christmas party was declined because when I asked myself if that sounded good, I got a firm “no”. We shall see what comes to pass for the rest of the season. I will continue with my ‘does it sound good?’ method and evaluate later if this helped me.
So ask yourself what can you say no to this season? How can you protect your energy? How can you create space to nourish your sensitivities? Ask yourself ‘does this sound good?’ when making your holiday plans. Focusing on self care will give you space to cultivate your gifts and sooth your nervous system. You can use this time to connect to your superpowers instead of shoving them down. I think you’ll see the tinsel and the mistletoe through in a whole new magical light.
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Thanks for reading and being here.
With Love,
Destiny
